Tiger Has Some Work Done On The Endoskeleton
April 16th, 2008 at 11:52 amBy Chris
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Proving the fact that even Terminator-like machines need maintenance as well, Tiger Woods had some arthroscopic surgery on his left knee to repair some cartilage damage… or so they say. Personally, I think it was repair some of the mechanisms that control his swing and his putting stroke, something that abandoned him at Augusta.
Being that Tiger is indeed a Terminator, I’m wondering if his procedure went something like this:
Because of his injury/scheduled maintenance session, Tiger will miss the upcoming Players Championship but he should be back to full functionality by the US Open in June, ready to continue his search for Sarah Connor — or collecting PGA Majors, depending on his programming parameters.
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April 16th, 2008 at 12:01 pm
Tiger will remove the offending bit from his knee with a Swiss Army Knife, juggle it on the end of a driver for 60 seconds, then hit it 400 feet out of midair.
April 16th, 2008 at 12:59 pm
And then say something like “**** You, ***hole” while lifting up his mattress to grab his weapons so he can decimate the field at Torrey Pines.
Or something like that.
April 16th, 2008 at 1:00 pm
Sarah Connor does not approve.
April 16th, 2008 at 1:09 pm
I don’t think Reese will be able to save her this time…
April 16th, 2008 at 4:55 pm
“Listen. And understand. That tigernator is out there. It can’t be bargained with. It can’t be reasoned with. It doesn’t feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And it absolutely will not stop, ever, until you are choking on 3-foot putts for birdie.”
April 17th, 2008 at 9:08 am
I wonder if he’s got the fazed plasma putter in the 40-watt range?
Made by Nike, of course.
June 10th, 2008 at 1:48 pm
[…] he hasn’t walked a full 18 since his knee surgery, Tiger Woods isn’t worried about being prepared for the US Open at Torrey Pines when it […]